一個年輕漂亮的美國女孩
在美國一家大型網上論壇金融版上發表了這樣一個問題帖：
我怎樣才能嫁給有錢人？
我下面要說的都是心裡話。本人25歲，非常漂亮，是那種讓人驚豔的漂亮，談吐文雅，有品位，想嫁給年薪50萬美元的人。
你也許會說我貪心，但在紐約年薪100萬才算是中產，本人的要求其實不高。
這個版上有沒有年薪超過50萬的人？你們都結婚了嗎？
我想請教各位一個問題——怎樣才能嫁給你們這樣的有錢人？
我約會過的人中，最有錢的年薪25萬，這似乎是我的上限。
要住進紐約中心公園以西的高尚住宅區，年薪25萬遠遠不夠。
我是來誠心誠意請教的，有幾個具體的問題：
一、有錢的單身漢一般都在哪裡消磨時光？（請列出酒吧、飯店、健身房的名字和詳細地址。）
二、我應該把目標定在哪個年齡層？
三、為什麼有些富豪的妻子看起來相貌平平？我見過有些女孩，長相如同白開水，毫無吸引人的地方，但她們卻能嫁入豪門。而單身酒吧裡那些迷死人的美女卻運氣不佳。
四、你們怎麼決定誰能做妻子，誰只能做女朋友？（我現在的目標是結婚。）
——波爾斯女士
下面是一個華爾街金融家的回帖：
親愛的波爾斯：我懷著極大的興趣看完了貴帖，相信不少女士也有跟你類似的疑問。
讓我以一個投資專家的身份，對你的處境做一分析。
我年薪超過50萬，符合你的擇偶標準，所以請相信我並不是在浪費大家的時間。
從生意人的角度來看，跟你結婚是個糟糕的投資決策，道理再明白不過，請聽我解釋。
拋開枝微末節，你所說的其實是一筆簡單的＂財＂＂貌＂交易：
甲方提供述人的外表，乙方出錢，公平交易，童叟無欺。
但是，這裡有個致命的問題，你的美貌會消逝，但我的錢卻不會無緣無故減少。
事實上，我的收入很可能會逐年涕增．而你不可能一年比一年漂亮。
因此，從經濟學的角度講，我是增值資產，你是貶值資產，
不但貶值，而且是加速貶值！
你現在25，在未來的五年裡，你仍可以保持窈窕的身段，俏麗的容貌，雖然每年略有退步。
但美貌消逝的速度會越來越快，如果它是你僅有的資產，十年以後你的價值甚憂。
用華爾街術語說，每筆交易都有一個倉位，跟你交往屬於＂交易倉位＂，
一旦價值下跌就要立即拋售，而不宜長期持有——也就是你想要的婚姻。
聽起來很殘忍，但對一件會加速貶值的物資，明智的選擇是租賃，而不是購入。
年薪能超過50萬的人，當然都不是傻瓜，因此我們只會跟你交往，但不會跟你結婚。
所以我勸你不要苦苦尋找嫁給有錢人的秘方。
順便說一句，你倒可以想辦法把自己變成年薪50萬的人，
這比碰到一個有錢的傻瓜的勝算要大。
希望我的回帖能對你有幫助。
如果你對＂租賃＂感興趣，請跟我聯繫。
——羅波．坎貝爾（J.P.摩根公司 CEO）
原文：
A reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan to a pretty girl seeking a rich husband
A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:
Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?
I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here. I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above.
You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.
My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?
I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?
Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit.
If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.
I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)
Ms. Pretty
A philosophical reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan:
Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.
My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope
everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.
From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.
Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money" : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.
However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.
Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.
By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position".
If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".
Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.This has better chance than finding a rich fool.
Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in "leasing" services, do contact me.
signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO
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